Aaahhh the life of a redneck, I can almost smell the butane and unwashed white people. They really don't have it bad, I would love to spend my life not working, drinking and sleeping with the barely legal neighbor. Can't wait until I can grow my hair and stomach grow out while finally being granted the freedom to used the "Dang heck y'all" vocabulary. Sitting in the trailer yard with a majority of the women looking like Gilbert Grape's mother featuring less clothes. Arguing with your brother/cousin/father/mayor about "Hey grandag who's got the longest beard here heck darn now?!" Wow the endless possibilities, I bet I could even find out what's so funny about farts. I'd much prefer to break a bottle of moonshine over a copper's head instead of the same old boring bottle of liquor. There's even the chance of becoming a famous musician if I learn how to hate any color of race that doesn't have a wife beater tan line on their chest... and gay people. Sorry just gay men it seems rednecks and homophobes don't count lesbians as gay because two women who hate cock is a total turn on for a real hetero. What sucks is being white (I prefer to be called beige) and over 5 foot nothing only allows me to choose the redneck life, even though I'd rather go Mexican they look like they have sex likes Jews. Did I forget anyone else I could possibly offend?
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