A list of things not to say in the bedroom area presented in one continuous sentence.

Looks like Christmas came twice this year I'm kind of used to cumming on my own chest actually your labia is creating a nice breeze I can push it in oh well I've done porn you might know me from there you going to eat that lucky for you I washed it today I think your pussy gave me gas you need to hurry my 2 o'clock will be here soon you smell like my mom are you still alive what was your name again I have AIDS you might be pregnant you're the same age as my daughter I don't normally cry this much do you also validate parking you have to squeeze it my cat likes to watch strong adam's apple there Stephanie you were my first I see dead people sorry I keep my spare change up there knock knock who's there sperm they look lopsided I think I might be gay is that the ice cream guy but you were born with 2 nipples right bet Nostradamus didn't see this one cumming don't be such a baby it's just a rape did your pussy eat eat itself ok but why is there a string in your asshole your pussy tastes like dick ugh my cock needs glasses nooooo that's how the priest would touch me I didn't know it could be that color I was the voice of Captain Planet my tits are bigger your pussy was painted by Picasso sorry I didn't think you would wake up sex always makes me think of my kids you know a good abortion clinic right ssshhh you'll wake Grandma that's where my Daddy would kiss me I lost the other one back in '86 I've never had an erection before so the belly button is off limits cool if I stab you afterwards that was quick I heard you say stop the first time I came let me know when you're done I hope you wake from this coma.

Wizard Of Id

NONSENSE

Definition of NONSENSE
1a : words or language having no meaning or conveying no intelligible ideas
b (1) : language, conduct, or an idea that is absurd or contrary to good sense (2) : an instance of absurd action
2a : things of no importance or value : trifles
b : affected or impudent conduct
3: genetic information consisting of one or more codons that do not code for any amino acid and usually cause termination of the molecular chain in protein synthesis

Ugh

1. Shaun White seems very humble.
2. 138 is really how long that face is.
3. If my child's face looked like Easter Island I wouldn't name him Rocky.
4. Hope he wins the Preakness next year.
5. I'd probably try to punch myself also.
6. His face is the same texture as the inside of a chronic masturbator's hand.
7. He needs to use a mattress as a pillow.

Clever Animals

Ok let's be serious for a moment. You really feel that after all the knowledge and evolution of species since the beginning of time, that the animal kingdom can not communicate with us. Maybe it's you, because as a fellow human I go out of my way not to converse with you. Or maybe it might just be that (whether domesticated or not) animals are just fucking rude. A bear is able to open your refrigerator and make a sandwich, but never once would a woodland creatures wave or even give a casual head nod in your direction. Shit cats are pretty much like ex's considering they wait by the door for you on payday and pretend to not understand phrases such as "eat it bitch it's good for you" and "go get a fucking job then". I assume must animals are disgusted by the human race more than I am. Yes I know I haven't posted in awhile and yes I know this is short, not funny and doesn't have a point, but I'm fucking busy and don't get paid for this so blow me. Kisses.